August 29, 2011 with 7 Comments

422.

4 Things that I Dread

I’m not afraid of much.

I’m single. I work late shifts. I live in a big city.

I’m pretty immune to fear. I’m sorry my mom has to hear me write this, but I can’t deny the truth. It helps that she sends me emails warning me about gang attack tactics every once in a while to keep me on my toes.

For better or for worse, I’m not afraid of much. Spiders I can handle. Heights are good for me. I can even handle really closed spaces.

I know what you’re thinking. That can’t be true. You can’t be afraid of nothing. There has to be something that freaks you out.

Ok, you win. There are in fact 4 things that I dread. I dislike the thought of them. l am, simply stated, afraid of them. Here they are in no order of importance.

1. Hypocrisy. I know I said there was no order of importance, but I have to admit that hypocrisy is pretty high up on the list of things that I fear. No one wants to be a hypocrite. No one likes hypocrites. The last thing I want is for people to find out I am not the same person in private that I am in public. I want nothing to do with that.

2. Failure. Who wants to fail? Who signs up for anything with the hopes of failing? Yuck. I hate failing. When I set out to do something, I want it to be successful. I give it my best not in an effort to fail, but in order to win. I despise failing.

3. Fruitlessness. This one is hard, but it makes the cut of things I dread. If you plant an apple tree, you want to see apples on it come harvest time. There’s nothing worse than a barren tree. I guess it goes hand in hand with failure. To me, fruitlessness feels like failure.

4. Loneliness. I like solitude and quiet. I enjoy living alone. But I hate that sinking aching feeling deep in the pit of my stomach on any given night when I feel, well, lonely. It comes out of nowhere. It doesn’t always linger, but I always dread it.

I’d like to end this post by telling you that because I hate these 4 things, I always avoid them. But I’d be lying.

Sooner or later, someone will catch on to areas of hypocrisy in my life. Sooner or later, I will fail. Whether I like it or not, some seasons may be more fruitful than others, and some fruit I may not see until eternity. And loneliness? Forget about it, it’s gonna come.

The key to powerful living isn’t in avoiding the things that you fear, but in acknowledging them, and trusting them to the one who has already overcome them.

God knew we would face fear. That’s why He gave us II Timothy 1:7 “for God gave us a spirit not of fear, but of power and love and self-control”.

What are some of the things you fear in your life?

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  • http://ZCxz Milo

    Good that you know yourself. I am afraid of heights, spiders, snakes, crocodiles, even large dogs etc…..But the fear of God is the beginning of wisdom. I try to remembeR this, so I can study and know more. To know and not to do it is sin.

  • http://twitter.com/angelaofcourse Angela

    failing my children – #1 fear.
    Not enough discipline – or too much. Setting the Christian example – making the right educational decisions, health care decisions. Giving enough freedom, giving too much…In a nut shell: protecting the most precious gifts God has entrusted me with :)

  • Gina

    Spiders, they have to many legs.some really big enough to walk on a leash.you would think dogs since I have a reminder of 1 that attacked me when I was young. I like what you said in dark print.So much truth im that
    Happy Monday. Thanks :)

  • Sue

    I agree with yours.. a few others came out at different times in my life… like fear of loss was huge when mom n hubby were competing to horrify me with near-death hospital trips. ) But watching the flood waters in the NE on the news this morning… and the water rushing in to the low places, I was reminded that God allows us to go through humbling times to cleanse us, and to allow His Spirit to pour into the Low places of our soul….and what comes out is so beautiful… thinking of the cross… that looked like a fruitless, failure…Also reminded of Heb 6:10

  • Jaclyn Hunt

    I would have to agree with Angela. Failing my kids, which includes me living up to my full purpose (or potential) that God had laid out for me.

  • http://www.fleurdealeta.blogspot.com Aleta

    In some ways, I’m like you… I don’t have a fear of heights. I don’t particularly LIKE spiders, but I won’t freak if one is near. Now, snakes, that might do me in. I used to be afraid of loneliness too. Keep your eyes on God and He’ll show you the path :)

  • Amber

    Thank you for sharing your fears with us, it means a lot. Right now as I’m writing on your blog I’m think about my fears. I really need to work on trusting God more then I already do. I’m fearing silly stuff right now, like I’m turning 30 a week from wednesday. Fearing telling my boss I get a part-time job. At the same time I know God is growing me and teaching me so much.