Single and Proud

I’m single and proud.

Married people sometimes don’t get that. They think us single gals sit around the house pining for a man. Or that sometimes we cry about it. They think we browse their facebook pages envious of the wonderful relationships they have with their men.

They are wrong.

We know too much. We know that men sweat, and their breath stinks. We know that guys like to watch TV, and women end up doing most of the work at home. We know that the Brady bunch is extinct, that there is no Alice, and that in most homes, both mom and dad have to go to work. We know that mom is the one who has to carry the baby for 9 months, and we know how hard it is to find time to exercise afterwards.

We know it all. We know the petty arguments, and that our married friends secretly envy our life. We know about college funds that we don’t have to save for, we know about coupons and groupon that we’ve only just heard about, and we know that even the best matches made by eharmony sometimes, well, fail.

Mind you, we sure wish we had the sex part, that’s for sure (sorry, mom, but it’s true). Other than that, we’re just happy to be left alone. Then again, we’ve heard from our married friends that the sex part loses its luster after ‘I do”, so even that ends up being unenviable. Go figure.

I heard some great advice at a Christmas concert last night. One of the band guys advised single girls not to consider a guy unless he could answer ‘Yes” to two questions:

1.Do you love Jesus?

2.Do you have a job?

The band member hit the nail on the head. Jesus and a job. Til death do us part.

It’s not as easy to find as you’d think. I joined eharmony last month. It started off as a dare, then curiosity got the best of me. I can’t tell you how many guys out there actually are on eharmony and boldly admit to not having a job.

Sign me up baby. I want that guy. He smells and I have to support him.

Ouch. I don’t mean to be mean, but the reality isn’t pretty if you want to be hitched. Better hear it straight before it’s too late.

Not me. I love Jesus, and I have a job.

My name is Lina. I’m single, and I’m proud.

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